Too many times people hurt us with harsh remarks.
But the way we handle harsh remarks can change the hurt. It can reduce it to virtually zero. The important premise is to understand why the person giving the harshness to us, is choosing harshness instead of friendly criticism in a constructive way.
The people who go around scolding others, are generally not too happy themselves. All too often they crave for being on top, for being better than others. And their, perhaps subconscious, perception is that if they put others down, it shows their own superiority. Nothing it further from the truth. Harshness, scolding merely is revealing our weakness.
Scolding is done by people with a twisted personality. If we are at the receiving end of a good scolding, we can listen to the content and see if we can learn something from it. But we do not have to let the harshness into our heart. I hear you think, that is easier said than done.
But in fact, it is not too difficult. It easy to feel pity for a person with a twisted back. It is also not too difficult to feel pity for a person with a personality so twisted that they feel the need to shout to appease their own ego into a feeling of superiority. If we understand that we can choose to pity that person for his or her inappropriate behavior, everything changes.
We do not have to accept the harshness, we do not have to let it into our heart. If I give you a pen and you refuse to take the pen, the pen remains with me. If someone calls you stupid and you do not accept the insult, you do not let it in, the insult, the stupidity stays with the giver of the insult.
So next time, you meet some harshness, do listen to the message inside the harshness. Then pity the person for his twisted personality, his lack of insight in how to create a harmonious relationship, do not let the insult into our heart and not even into our mind, let them keep the words they say and go on with our journey.
Try to practice this little gem of wisdom. It is a great way to deal with harsh people intending to hurt others.
ENJOY
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