Letting love flow

You cannot give away what you don't have. 

 

While the above sounds obvious, so obvious that it is almost ridiculous,

there is more to it, than initially meets the eye

If you are not good at giving away love, 

it may well be that there is not much love in your heart

If your heart is filled with contempt

that is what you can give away

If your  heart is filled with hatred and anger

that is what you can give away

If your heart is filled with old grudges, 

that is what you will give away.

While we get a short ego-boost, when we give away contempt,

It hurts our soul, it hurts our good-natured self

While we get a short ego boost expressing anger and contempt,

it hurts our heart, it hurts our body, it hurts our happiness

While we get a short ego boost expressing grudges,

it takes away our own peace of mind

While we have to put our ego a bit aside to give love,

that is what brings us a good feeling, peace of mind and happiness

We were made like that. Contempt, anger, grudges, hatred was useful when we were living in caves

But its usefulness has waned and the creative force in the universe, that many call our God, has given us a constitution, a inherent nature of our inner being,

that we thrive on love, on giving praise, on being nice and kind.

If we manage to push aside contempt, anger and grudges,

and let in the Love of our Creator,

it will become easy to give away love 

If we allow our hearts to be filled with love 

happiness will lurk around every corner, 

every second of the day. 

 

 

For our heart to be ONLY filled with love may seem an utopia,

but we can work towards putting in our heart more love and less contempt.
What is inside, will come out.
If we press an orange, orange juice will come out, nothing else because nothing else is inside

If somebody presses us, stresses us, what will come out? Anger and hatred,

or will we have stored enough love inside our hearts to let love flow no matter what?

(the above was inspired by W Dyer)

That's who we are

Whether you believe in evolution or creation 

Whether you believe in capitalism or socialism

Whether you are religious or not,

All of us have one common trait

 

And the common trait is that we are happy 

if we make a positive difference in this world.

 

Please my dear reader, think about this:

Compare your level of happiness 

the day after you attended a big party

to your level of happiness

the day after you really helped a person 

who needed your help. 

 

Please my dear reader think about this:

does giving a helping hand not make you far more happy

than buying an expensive gift for your self?

 

Please dear reader, try to push aside all preconceived ideas

about how to get happy and just put the two experiences 

next to each other. 

 

I have experienced both.
I have bought myself lots of expensive things.
Each time I was happy but it was short lasting 

It was of a completely different, lower quality, when compared to the very good feelings I experience while and after going the extra mile to help someone who needs it.

 

We were made like this. 

We evolved like this.
Not a person can deny this giant truth

Happiness, true happiness lies in helping others,

in going the extra mile

Happiness, peace of mind, true peace of mind

resides in selfless service

Happiness, true happiness does NOT reside in spending lots of money

Happiness, any happiness does NOT reside in getting drunk every weekend

Happiness does not reside in partying throughout the night

 

Happiness does not reside in showing of our luxurious living style

Happiness resides in selfless service

Happiness resides in going the extra mile

Happiness resides in kindness

in random kind acts

Please my reader, be aware of this giant truth

Happiness is worth trying to get.
It is so easy to get it, if we just put our own ego a bit aside

and start to think, what can I do to make someone else happy. 

WE WERE MADE LIKE THIS
We evolved like this.

Not into the night

While it may sometimes feel good to fight. 

Especially when we are convinced, we’re right 

Let us not carry the anger into to the night.

Before sleep, try to see it also from another side

It may be not just a little bit, but very wise: 

if we have to choose between being right or nice, 

nice may carry much more value and good,

a truth not easy to do, but widely understood.

 

Attempting to understand another point of view, 

does not mean we have to give up what we knew, 

But it may soften the stance and enlighten you  

And the same will go for the one you were fighting, too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The order...

In a restaurant we may order exactly what we want. 

Or we can say to the chef, please cook the best for us. 

If we are in a good restaurant, 

we know and expect 100%, either way, the food will be good.

In the universe we may strive to get exactly what we want

or we can ask the universe to give us the best

The universe is good place place to live in 

and we can expect that the experience will be good.

Let us be guided by the wisdom in the universe

Let us go into nature and reflect and think.

The "Chef" will only use the best the best ingredients

and what we'll get will be "delicious"

The best

The best experience in my day so far was the meeting with parents of a baby born at 27 weeks of gestation. The baby was 2 weeks old and had never been held by his mom. I invited to mom to hold the baby even he was still taken care of in an incubator with nasal respiratory support. It took some extra efforts to ensure the whole event remained safe for the baby but it was such a pleasure the see the moments of pure joy between mom and baby. 

Mom's love is the among the biggest possible gifts we can receive. Even to observe it brings so much happiness to our heart. 

A small trick

 What was your best experience in the last 24 hours?

 

Trying to find the answer to this, you will have to think and at least partially relive in your mind, all your good experiences of the last 24 hours and then choose which one was really the best one. 

 

Reliving our good experiences, even if it is only in our imagination, is bringing with it the good feelings that were experienced once more. Automatically you will enjoy the good things again. You are enjoying in 24h, all the good things that happened to you not once but twice. 

Automatically it will lead to more gratefulness in your life. 

 

Just do it. Think about what was best. Enjoy all the candidate-events again.

Become grateful 

A small rhyme on this same topic :)    

What was your best experience in the last 24 hours?

A nice word from a friend or just seeing some flowers?

Try to find the answer to a question like this

and you 'll live twice through every moment of bliss

Every moment of beauty, every word so kind

that appeared in your life will reappear in your mind

Each lovely moment, and creative success too.

You will relive each joy that happened to you

You will scan all good things from the day that is gone

and choose carefully which was the very best one.

 

Gratefulness will well up in your heart and soul

and that may be still the best feeling of all.

 

 

Prayers

Many people nowadays doubt the value of prayers.

And they are right in a way. So many prayers go unanswered.

Unheard, unanswered prayers have caused many to stop praying.

 

I feel we cannot blame it all on the prayers;

but rather on the way we pray, on the way we were taught to pray.

As children we were asked to memorize the prayers taught at school.

Then we followed the ways of our adult examples:

just recite what was memorized without any thought

without any reflection, and quite often really fast. 

The more prayers we can say, the better,

sometimes repeating the same prayers up to fifty or more times in one session.

This type of prayer is pushing many rational thinking minds away from religion.

This type of prayer is however not completely useless as some want to believe.

Just making time for God and even reciting learned prayers without thinking about the meaning

is still a valuable experience to many and if it is done in group it has a binding effect among the ones participating in the group prayer.

 

But prayer can be so much more.

 

I invite you, even if you have given up on praying, even if you have given up on faith,

to take ten minutes of your time and say a prayer, not only with your lips, fast within your mind,

but say the prayer you learned as a child, in an extremely slow way, giving a lot of thought about the meaning of each word, each phrase you say. If we would teach our children to pray like that, the chances that they enjoy prayers would be soooo much bigger. 

Taking some time to feel the creative intelligence of the universe,

that intelligent force which is truly what we call God. 

That intelligent force that makes a tree in your garden grow against gravity,

brings all what's in an apple from deep under the ground to some place high in the crown,

lets it ripen before it is finally obeying the law of gravity and falls on the ground. 

Atheists call it the laws of nature, the forces of nature, but where do the forces come from?

So well balanced that a tree full of apples, once a seed, now bears fruit high in the sky, every year. 

 

If all of nature was the result of a limited number of forces, laws of nature, it makes it only more amazing. Laws of nature are not laws; they are mere regularities that are discovered that happen in a certain recognizable pattern. Gravity is one of these, an undeniable force, but so well balanced with other forces that the fruits go up a tree stem, that the evaporated water floats up to form clouds, giving life-essential water to all that lives. 

If we start our prayer praising this life giving intelligence present everywhere in the universe, we stand in awe. Our prayer is no longer mindless recitation, but some beautiful thoughts about the world around us and its Creator boil up from deep within our heart. We can intuit the intelligence. Prayer becomes an excitement, something enthralling, something that makes us feel good from within and something we can feel from without. 

Please go on and say the prayer you learned when you were small,

thinking, reflecting, using the fullest of your imagination 

and you will discover something really valuable...

 

 

 

 

 

The key

"Imagine a man, born with a heart full of kindness 

but it is hidden under a mountain of greed.

 

He has something within 

of more worth 

than all gold on earth, 

but he is not rich" 

 

                               Aufie Zophy

 

Today, I envision a world, where all of us are aware that kindness is the key, the golden key to happiness. I envision a world where each and every person will value his own innate happiness so much and generate more of it through kindness. Whenever we move away from that kind way that flows out of an inexhaustible stream coming out of our heart, there will be one word we tell ourselves, that can jolt us back to that road where the stream of kindness flows. That one word will be used by all of the humans on earth and if we hear it from a friend it will move our heart and we will let kindness flow. If we meet a friend who got a bit lost, a bit away from the stream of kindness, we can just utter the word and move him back to creative kindness, that will bring both you and your friend back to that innate happiness generated by kindness...

                Let us choose a word right now and start to use it within our inner circle of friends first. Let the word be WEMA, Swahili for kindness.

                If tomorrow you feel like anger is rising, or you feel like you are not kind enough, simply say to yourself "Wema", say it aloud and allow it to be a clue to become a bit kinder. If your friend is a bit angry, just say "Wema". The friend may ask what you just said and you can share its meaning and encourage him to tell you just "Wema", if he or she feels you need to be a bit kinder.

                Can this work? Sure it can. Let us start and multiply kindness now. Let us start to use the use code word, and make WEMA or KINDNESS the norm rather than something exceptional in this wonderful world. :) 😀

I love the word WEMA, it has "we" that stands for togetherness and it has "ma" a word for mother used all over the world, our mom, the supreme symbol of loving kindness.

We for togetherness
Ma for motherly love
Wema for ever flowing kindness

If you feel a bit angry
Let WEMA enter your thoughts
and instantly become a bit kinder

If a friend is a bit nasty

tell him just the word WEMA 

and explain what it means

Ask your friends to just say WEMA
if they think a bit of kindness
is what you need

Wema, that little word
full of power
meaning kindness in Swahili.

Let us use it forever
every day, forever.

                                                 Aufie Zophy

Kind

 There are times we want to be only kind

They tend to come at unexpected moments

Small things that suddenly touched our hearts 

and make us the kindest person in the world 

 

Do you remember moments like this? 

They tend to be the best moments of our life, aren't they? 

 

I just now saw a video containing a few wonderful stories of kindness.

I want you to see the video too: 

here is the link: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NXkJ9eNpWNw 

I hope you enjoy the video as much as I did.
I hope you come back to this blog after seeing the video

and read some more messages on kindness and some other good things :)

 

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links to my other blogs/sites:

Really good poetry https://aufiezophypoems.blogspot.com/

some beautiful inspirational quotes:  https://quotesfromhans.blogspot.com/ 

a fantastic short story: https://afishwithawish.blogspot.com/2020/08/a-fish-with-wish-whole-story.html

or look at some beautiful skies: https://hansvro.wixsite.com/mysite-1/skies-seen-by-hans 

or beautiful flowers: https://hansvro.wixsite.com/flowersbyhans

or simply some essays about good things: https://abcofvirtues.blogspot.com/

Life is not easy, but beautiful

If we begin 

to discover and appreciate

the hidden bliss 

and good feeling

in personal growth

 

If we start 

to become aware

of the beauty

that is around us all time

 

Our life 

assumes colours

that are unusually awesome 

In each of our lives, there are so many challenges, so many difficult moments. It are these moments that ensure we keep growing, not physically but growth in personality, psychologically, emotionally, in character, spiritually, ....

Once we appreciate that hidden inside this growth, there is a sea of bliss and good feelings, the challenges affect us slightly differently and we may make some time to notice all beauty around us. 

 

 

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links to my other blogs/sites:

Really good poetry https://aufiezophypoems.blogspot.com/

some beautiful inspirational quotes:  https://quotesfromhans.blogspot.com/ 

a fantastic short story: https://afishwithawish.blogspot.com/2020/08/a-fish-with-wish-whole-story.html

or look at some beautiful skies: https://hansvro.wixsite.com/mysite-1/skies-seen-by-hans 

or beautiful flowers: https://hansvro.wixsite.com/flowersbyhans

or simply some essays about good things: https://abcofvirtues.blogspot.com/

Give and take

 All my life 

I have learned 

to give and take

Whenever I took

It made me happy 

for a few moments

Whenever I gave

it brought Happiness 

that seemed to be never ending.

 

 

Benevolence

 

  A homeless man admitted to the hospital asked me where he could get a deck of playing cards. I answered him that he could try the convenience store within the hospital compound. Somehow I knew the likelihood of the convenience store selling playing cards was quite low and even if they would sell them there, there was no way the man had money to buy them. When later, I drove home, I thought about my day in the car and became aware that I had been not nice. I think it was guilt that made me search and find a deck of playing cards and go back to the hospital and give it to the man. 

 

Actually this was such important event in my life. On my way home after giving the cards to him, I felt like being afloat. I felt so good inside. The smile on his face was priceless.This is the reward of benevolence, a happiness of supreme quality, top notch happiness, grade 1 happiness,...

 

I was aware of the feeling that simple act of kindness, of benevolence was really giving to me. I loved it and I could not remember a time when I felt so good about something. I took some time to think deeper about it. Society around me thought happiness is to be found in going out to cafes with friends. Society felt that happiness was generated by getting material things and showing them off. Society felt....

Society has been wrong! Some comfort and good feeling may be found in all the above but supreme, grade1, top notch happiness is found in kind acts. I am now fully aware, the more simple extra things I do just in service of others, the more I get true happiness. And the quality of my life is supreme on days I manage to several random kind acts. On days when my soul seems weaker and I have mainly ego driven achievements, I feel some pride but it is so different from the true happiness that lies in benevolence.

 

 Benevolence is the desire to do good to others. That desire resides in its highest form in the wisest of people.

 

Teaching

I have been a teacher and a doctor for many years in my life. I have been formally teaching medical students, trying to deliver knowledge to them in the most interesting and most logical and understandable way, stressing why certain bits of knowledge are absolutely essential to keep in our brain and not in our smartphones.

I have made PowerPoint presentations. As a teacher you know whether the delivery of your lecture is effective or not because when it is effective, the audience, our students are quiet. They sit and look at you. They sit and look at your slides. And that is quite a rewarding part of teaching. I have had colleagues who were teaching and they became very irritated with the students because there was a constant background noise of students talking with each other in a slow voice. One of these colleagues burst out in a bout of anger demanding absolute silence. It worked for a short while. He got absolute silence for a few minutes but then the noise started again. The cause of the noise was not the students. The cause of the noise was a lack of preparation of the lecture by the teacher. He did not captivate the attention of his students. He was knowledgeable, he was good in his field but he did not apply basic principles to give a lecture that makes your audience silent.

It is not extremely difficult to give a good PowerPoint presentation. Two ingredients only. One, read a good book on how to create and give a good PowerPoint presentation. Two, empathy. Empathy? Yes empathy. Imagine yourself being part of the audience listening to you with the background knowledge of the person in the audience. What would you need to stay focused on what is said? What would jolt your attention back to the speaker and slides when you had been distracted by something else? If we think like this while making our slides, while preparing how we will deliver it, while doing the actual talk, we will be reasonably good orators, keeping the attention, avoiding the background noise of people talking to each other instead of listening to the talk.

But teaching is so much more than sharing knowledge. PowerPoint presentations are NOT the best way of teaching. I have created a few pages on interactive teaching with links below.

interactive teaching - intro 

interactively teaching knowledge

teaching-skills-we-may-get-it-wrong.

peer teaching and ownership

interactive sessions-to-teach-skills